BTVS- Last Chances.
by Leni
Summary: Kind of prequel for "The More It Changes"


TITLE: Last Chances  
AUTHOR: Leni   
DISCLAIMER: Reading this you *may* think that they are really mine... Think again.  
DISTRIBUTION: Tell me where it's going.  
SUMMARY: When a match made in heaven goes to hell... I just know you are going to like this, Jess...  
TIMELINE: 1 year into the future, two before 'The More It Changes...'  
FEEDBACK: I'll be waiting. Please don't disappoint me. :o)  
  
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She never thought it would hurt so much.  
  
All had begun that day, that day weeks ago when she had come back home and didn't find her love there.  
  
"Where are you?" she had asked.  
  
And she had received no answer because she was alone and later because none was given.  
  
Only silence, a shameful look and nervous babbling. Never an answer.  
  
She had known that hell had begun then and there, but she never thought it would hurt so much.   
  
It wasn't supposed to be this way. They were going to be together forever. No matter the past, the discussions and their friends... Happiness was theirs to cherish. They had sworn.  
  
Sworn and failed.  
  
She was alone now. And she knew that this time nobody would come back and give no answers.  
  
How had this happened?  
  
When had their dream turned into this?  
  
She sank in their bed and tried to get a hold on her emotions.   
  
Love.  
  
She had loved and been loved. Nobody had ever stirred her feelings in such a form. Nobody except the one who had left her now. Now and forever.  
  
Grief.  
  
This time she had really believed they would make it and it hadn't mattered. It didn't matter if she still hadn't shed a tear. She could feel the distress flowing in her veins unstoppably...  
  
Loneliness.  
  
Now and forever. now and forever. now and...  
  
Guilt.  
  
Maybe it was her own fault. It didn't matter what her friends and her mother would say. It had to be her own fault. Maybe she wouldn't be alone now if she had been a little more understanding, a little more sweeter, just a little more better.  
  
She had come to her apartment from work an hour ago and found nobody home. She had gone through the rooms and the bathroom and the kitchen looking for a trace of her lover. None was to be found. Just her own things resting neatly in their place, a huge empty space besides them. Just never as huge as the one opening in her heart.  
  
This had to be a nightmare. A nightmare where she was still waiting for the monsters and the things that go bump in the night to appear... Wait! They weren't a nightmare either. Then this had to be real life. *Her* real life.  
  
A real life where she couldn't find the shirt that she so loved to wear to sleep, where she couldn't find that photo of the two of them embracing lovingly under the moonlight.  
  
Has her love taken it? Why? Just to remember what had once been?  
  
She couldn't understand anything now. She didn't want her friends to console her and say that it never was her fault. They would just repeat the same words they had said years ago. And she would be forced to give them a great show again.  
  
No!   
  
This time she would deal with it. She had matured, she could do it alone. For the nth time in her life she had been left alone and she didn't like this more than the first one, but it was time for her to confront the loneliness face to face.   
  
She could do it.  
  
Everyone had left her alone at a time and she had always overcome it. Her parents, her friends, her lovers, and now...  
  
Was it fair?  
  
She knew it wasn't.  
  
Maybe she could have been a little more understanding and sweeter and better but it still wasn't fair to be left alone with nothing but her memories and a ring. She didn't even have a bittersweet good-bye to hold on. She never did get one.  
  
And that was when she saw the piece of paper on their bed. No, not their bed anymore... It was written with that special script she could recognise between thousand others.  
  
// I'm sorry. I couldn't do this anymore. We have drifted apart too much in these years. I never thought our happiness would last so little time. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. I never wanted to hurt you. I just can't do this anymore. I can't live in this lie anymore. Can you understand me? It was beautiful, believe me. It just wasn't meant to be. Do you understand? //  
  
She was crying now. And she was crying because she did understand. She could not blame herself more than she could blame her lover. It had been beautiful. She knew that. And she also knew that it wouldn't last the day she came back and didn't find anybody at home...  
  
She just never thought it would hurt so much.  
  
What to do now?  
  
She was free now, she realised. As free as one could be when you didn't want to be free. She never did like it. It always meant to be alone and crying. She didn't like a bit but it was a fact...  
  
She was free.  
  
What to do now?  
  
Deal with it as she had planned? Without friends and their stupid questions? Without their blind faith and love?  
  
She could do it.   
  
Did she want to?  
  
And she remembered that she had a friend she could always count with, a friend that had helped her though school and college and real life. She needed that kind of help now.  
  
She bolted through the room into the living room. She didn't notice the missing pictures and missing articles as she passed. She grabbed the phone and marked the already learnt number.  
  
It rang thrice before someone answered her.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
It was her best friend's voice.   
  
"Hello... Is someone there?"  
  
What should she do now? Before the sense of guilt at bothering him could stop her she breathed deeply and readied herself to greet her most beloved friend and burden him with her problems.  
  
"Oz?... T-Tara left me..." she said. It came out more as a sob.  
  
And it didn't matter that she wasn't more understanding and sweeter and better because she was about to hear that she would always be the best.  
  
He knew that this was his last chance. And last chances were something Daniel Osbourne wasn't about to lose.  
  
"What can I do for you, Will?"  
  
THE END  
  
  
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Reading the feedback for 'The More It Changes..." (Willow's POV with A/X, C/W, W/O and B/A! underlines) I realised that one of the readers was right. I never said what happened with Tara. This is my attempt to explain it. Send feedback???? PLEASE?? 


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